Welcome to Deadspin’s The Sports activities Nihilist, the place all is for naught and we’re however unintended jolts of electrified meat caught to the floor of a rock in an detached universe. F*ck you.
Two of the primary storylines through the NFL Draft course of concerned a few rookie quarterbacks who now are out every week (or two) with accidents. Scouts puzzled if Bryce Younger was large enough to play quarterback on the subsequent degree, and likewise marveled at Anthony Richardson’s Adonis-like physique. Nicely, the previous Alabama QB and Heisman winner will miss every week or so with a sprained ankle, and the Colts’ first-year starter is sidelined below concussion protocol.
Richardson really left Indianapolis’ first sport late within the remaining quarter resulting from knee and ankle soreness — and recklessness. That very same fearlessness (naivete?) obtained him into the endzone twice in Week 2 earlier than the second TD run ended together with his head bouncing off the turf-covered concrete, and in the event you suppose there’s a good archetype for NFL quarterback, Richardson is proof that no quantity of bodily expertise, or rule adjustments, ensures an extended profession.
So if head trauma is that this nice equalizer, why obsess over stature and a capability to take bodily punishment when any QB may go at any level? I might draft Younger with the primary choose one million instances out of one million if given a redo, and if he breaks, there’ll at all times be one other physique to take his spot.
Is it slightly nihilistic? Completely, however that’s the NFL’s enterprise mannequin. Seven years out of Tua Tagovailoa is healthier than 15 seasons of Ryan Tannehill. I wager Invoice Belichick would commerce Mac Jones for Younger tomorrow.
Guys like Tom Brady, John Elway, and Patrick Mahomes are anomalies; Jedis strolling amongst us in a position to navigate small and shifting pockets with human missiles bearing down on them. The remainder of the elite guys have a restricted quantity of tread earlier than finally getting blindsided by a truck and hauled off on a golf cart.
What number of NFL greats at any place had been in a position to exit on their very own phrases? I’m stunned Jerry Rice can stroll upright, to be sincere. (Gotta be that Copper Match.) I imply, in the event you don’t have a child or a partner by 35, you’re technically lifeless. Procreation is the one goal, and the extra people there are, the extra flesh there’s for soccer.
I don’t know in the event you’re conscious of this, however the Earth has a inhabitants disaster on its fingers, and the extra individuals we will persuade to take part in fight sports activities, the faster we will turnover these two tops — metaphorically talking.
Wouldn’t reservations for demise be simpler than making an attempt to stave it off? It’s a “You recognize you solely had a day to dwell” kind of factor, however solely you realize your expiration date. If somebody stated you’ve obtained till 45, I’m taking part in operating again, consuming sizzling wings for breakfast, and mixing in a splash of opioids for good measure. I’m going out early? I’m cramming in as a lot self-fulfillment as potential.
And it’s possible you’ll end up dwelling in a shotgun shack
And it’s possible you’ll end up in one other a part of the world
And it’s possible you’ll end up behind the wheel of a big car
And it’s possible you’ll end up in a stupendous home, with a stupendous spouse
And it’s possible you’ll ask your self, “Nicely, how did I get right here?”
I’ve no clue, however give me some timing, slightly moxie, numerous arm power, and I’ll give you a stunning home and a stupendous spouse.
